I Want to Pray but I’m Bored

 

“…prayer is a battle. Against whom? Against ourselves and against the wiles of the tempter who does all he can to turn man away from prayer, away from union with God. We pray as we live, because we live as we pray. (CCC 2725)

I knew in my heart that I have to pray before I start my day and before I sleep at night. I found myself uttering same words whenever I come to God in prayer. I am not experiencing dryness ‘cause I am not even noticing that my prayer life became dry but I grew bored in my prayer.

SPIRITUAL BOREDOM, it is when you STILL bend your knees to pray, read the bible EVERYDAY, go to mass RELIGIOUSLY yet non of these efforts bring consolation and you are JUST FINE with it! In half-awake, half-asleep state, I prayed and read the bible every morning because I have to! In the midst of a jam-packed day, I hear mass because I have to. Establishing a daily prayer time makes praying too regular, meeting God is no longer something that neither excites me nor gives gratification. It is not that God is silent but I have reached a state of plateau in my prayer life because I am bored with the “ROUTINE”. Which made me realized that past days, praying (even regular) does not make me having a prayer life because my Spirituality is not living; it is only existing.

Prayers do not need to be lengthy nor SHOULD it gratify, but prayer is all about having conversations with God. It is beyond reporting how’s your day as if He is a boss that evaluates your work, it is beyond presenting your wish list as if He is Santa Clause or some kind of magician but prayer is spending time with God like having coffee with your friends or dinner dates with your loved ones or spending time with your parents at the living room. Prayer is a conversation wherein you listen as He speaks because rest assured; you have His full attention when you speak.

One night, I went too bed in a wee hour, so tired, weary and sleepy; I curled on my side and while battling with my lethargic consciousness, I prayed,

“Dear Lord, Tonight, I surrender to you my tired body
that is too exhausted to get up and talk to you, my eyes that are too strained to read the Bible and my mind that is too drained to keep my senses sane. But Father as I close my eyes, please be at my side; let me feel Your presence. All of my thoughts, weariness & doubts, I am surrendering these to you. Just be with me, comfort me and strengthen me. Amen.”

That night, I felt His presence; like a mother humming a lullaby, a father that kissed me goodnight and like a favorite pillow  that cushioned  me to a soporific state. His promise on Luke 11:28 “Come to me, all you who labor and burdened, and I will give you rest”, is very real in a very personal way.

Boredom is a barometer of our present condition, a state wherein there is a need to do something.
When it is difficult to pray, PRAY.
When you cannot hear God, PRAY.
When you are disappointed, PRAY.
When you are hurt, PRAY.
When you are weary, PRAY.
When you are bored with your prayer, PRAY.

Whether it’s a minute or an hour, may our prayers be a surge of our frail heart, not empty words of our logical mind.  God is waiting for us to come to Him, exactly as who we are and what we’ve been through today.

PRAY not because you have to but because you need so.

How is your prayer life? Is it  living or just existing?

ALLOW GOD TO MEET YOU WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW. HE IS WAITING…
ENJOY YOUR DATE WITH GOD!!!